GLBT History Month: My Personal History

This topic probably doesn't mean much to anyone besides me, but my own gay history was easier than most due to my family. Both my awareness and self-identity concerns surrounding my sexual orientation were minor compared to those of my friends. The same is true about coming out to my immediate family. My situation was significantly less stressful than others on account of my relatives. I never felt that I was all alone with a dark secret that I needed to hide.

On my Greek side of the family (paternal), I have three first cousins, all older, who are openly gay. The eldest of these is sixteen years my senior. By the time that I was a toddler, he was already out to all our extended family. Growing up, I've always known him as being paired with another man. When I was younger, this did seem odd to me but none of my adult family reacted negatively.

This same cousin has two younger brothers (identical twins) who are gay. They are nine years older than me. Closer in age, they became people that I looked up to. I remember their coming out process. Like myself, they're both Deaf and their acknowledging their sexuality was no big deal. They're both confirmed nudists and all these reasons combined have made a strong bond between the three of us. Not only are they my cousins, they're my best friends as well. We're in constant communication among ourselves and frequently vacation together. Even though we all live hundreds of miles apart, we often visit.

In my Nigerian half of family, my mother has an older sister who is lesbian. My aunt emigrated to Canada after graduating from the University of Ibadan. She's lived in Toronto with the same partner for as long as I can remember. Because of our age difference and geographical distance, we aren't especially close. We do exchange emails and greeting cards.

This brief family history highlights the importance of us living our lives open and free. The honesty of my relatives made a major difference in my life. They provided me with positive role models on my journey towards understanding and accepting myself.